MR. "PIE ARE SQUARED"

Hello Diary!
Today, while studying my Real Estate course I came across a chapter that goes over real estate math and in short, it is the math I have spent most of my early and adult life desperately trying to avoid. There was nothing for it now but to buckle down and figure it all out. While thus studying, once again I came upon my old nemesis, "PIE ARE SQUARED". Now I have had disagreements with Mr. "PIE ARE SQUARED" for a long time simply because any fool can see just by looking that "PIE ARE ROUND", They were born round, they live round and they remain round until the day they die or are eaten, whichever is the more appropriate terminology when we talk about pie passing. I can and will stipulate to "CAKE ARE SQUARED" but that is a completely different equation.
Anyway, having decided that I could stipulate to "PIE ARE SQUARED" solely for the sake of arguement and hypotheticals, I ho'ed forth to the kitchen to test out this "PIE ARE SQUARED" theory. I pulled a pie out of the fridge that I was saving for company and inspected it. I Noticed again that "PIE ARE ROUND" but remembered my previous stipulation and let it go. I then measured the DIAMETER of the pie paying close attention to its flaky, buttery and delicious crust. I then cut the DIAMETER in half and ate it leaving the RADIUS. I then multiplied the RADIUS by 3.1416 (what ever that is) and found the area of the pie prior to the point where I had eatened half of its DIAMETER.(The eating of the DIAMETER was important because I did not want it encroaching on the other DIAMETERS thus throwing off my painstaking calculations.) Sure enough! I had the AREA of my pie and have proven that (in theory only of course because it is a lie like all math) that "PIE ARE SQUARED"! I called Little into the room and such was our excitement that we ate the remaining AREA of the pie as well a it's HEIGHT and WIDTH and licked up all the crumbs. Little and I agree that practical application can sometimes be the difference between using information (Which I plan to do tomorrow when I calculate the area of a cake thus proving the formula "CAKE ARE SQUARED" as well as this one) and just taking things on faith. There is nothing like a tummy full of pie to really get a concept home. Little and I also agree that math may not be great for weight loss, what with all the practical application et. al. but it is seriously good for Pi lovers!
See you next time Diary!