Let's talk Loofah!

Well Diary Its Sunday here and the weather is beautiful which makes me realize beach season cometh and that means I'd better address these thighs. (I'd like to adddress them to China but unfortunately they are attached.)Little and I plan to go for a walk today. We have decided that gentle persistence is the way to successful weight loss.

The area I walk is very hilly and this gives us much needed aerobic exercise. I hate aerobic exercise but there is not much I can do about that. Huffing and puffing depletes calories like a Lamborghini Mercialago depletes oil rich countries. I have to turn my 1970's VW body into a Lambo and run on rich fuel. With that in mind I had several pancakes for my diet breakfast. Little also had some sausages. They were turkey suasages and tasted ike unlit cigars but he liked them. We are launching our walk in a bit. Since Sunday is a day pretty much devoid of waist-friendly stress the walk will be a substitute.

Meanwhile let's talk Loofah!
I saw an ad yesterday that promotes Loofahs as the new weight loss miracle. Apparently you get a large Loofah and rub all the fat off you. Loofahs are imbued with magical qualities that, as you rub, melt fat on the inside of your body and you just simply pee it out! With that in mind I went to the Wal Mart and purchased several mattress sized Loofah's. I cut them into bite sized pieces and when Little and I shower we are going to Loofah off several tons of unsightly body fat. Then we are going to pee for hours and then go bathing suit shopping. It is perfect! I have a giant Loofah supply that I am storing in my wine cellar for emergency binge Loofahing in the case of a food diary black out period. I'll let you know how it goes. By tomorrow I intend to look just like the Victoria's Secret models. I imagine they have been privvy to the Loofah secret the entire time. Time to share the wealth girls!